Picking up women is one of those things that can be just as complicated or simple as you want. I mean if you really wanted to you could go into all the biological reasons that women behave the way that they do, why they respond to what they respond to, and how this all best fits into a man’s life. There are books upon books written about that subject and if one wanted they could immerse themselves it in for weeks at a time and frankly come away with interesting and informative information that would improve their sex life, or mating strategy to use the scientific term.
However most guys just want to get their dicks wet a little more (or at all) and for that all this information is not required and as a matter of fact can simply clog up the process. If you’re a guy who just wants to have sex with more women and that’s it then this article is going to show you all that you need to know. It’s really not that complicated of a process nor is it hard. Chances are if it’s hard for you then you are focusing on the wrong things, which I will address here shortly. Remember getting laid is easy, stop making it so hard.
Mistakes
Alright first off let’s do some troubleshooting that I know will inevitably arise. You’ve probably heard about passive and active game. If not here’s the breakdown. Passive game is things like how your dress, your body language, how you speak, and what kind of shape your in. Active game is making eye contact, touching her, smiling at the right times, and acting the right way. Many who end up in failure after failure with women believe if they just spam approach woman after woman that they’re improving a skill when in reality they are just wasting their time.
If you’re a weak effeminate nerd (aka 99% of PUAs) then you’re shooting yourself in the foot. You need to focus on gaining some muscle, dressing nice, and getting those T levels up. You need to be masculine and socially calibrated. This really isn’t that hard to do. So if you’re a guy who is focusing on simply approaching thinking you’re building a skill of some sort you’re really not. There is no merit in getting rejected 100 times simply to get rejected 100 times. And if it takes you talking to 50 women there is something wrong with you (that you can address and need too).
Look for the average guy even with no game 1 out of 10 women is going to sleep with him just because he’s a warm body and not a creep (unlike PUAs). Add in muscles, nicely dressed, socially calibrated (can read if a woman has no interest in them), and above all else masculine and that number is going to shoot up tremendously. It’ll never be 10 out of 10 just because but it can get above 5. PUAs will tell you this is impossible but that’s because they have deep issues and don’t know what they’re doing. Alright so you’re hitting the gym, dressing nice, not a social retard, and are masculine. These are all things you should be working on at all times. And remember sleeping with women is part of your life, not your life.
Approach & Escalate
It’s really pretty simple simply approach a woman and then escalate on her. Touch her more, make more eye contact, smile more and if she’s receptive then it’s on and just a matter of time and logistics to when you sleep together. See no fancy theories, no you gotta do X, Y, & Z or anything like that. Simple and too the point just how it should be. Remember to be socially calibrated and read her signals. If she’s obviously telling you to go away then go away don’t sit there and push and push when she doesn’t want it no matter what. I’m not saying to run away if she looks away for one second. Look just be socially calibrated and you’re good.
Understand social cues and when she’s playing with you and when she’s genuinely not interest. Don’t try to win over women who aren’t interested in you, it’s a waste of time. For those guys who really struggle with this first off remember don’t focus on approaching as many women as possible focus on working out, dressing nicer, be more socially calibrated, and being more masculine first and foremost. But then you may also want to look for women who smile at you or wave at you first before approaching them. As you work on yourself more and more women will do this.
The Truth
Look most guys who get into PUA type stuff really shouldn’t have sleeping with lots of women as their main priority. They’re just not at that level. Maybe this is you. Hey it’s fine most of us have been there at one point or another. Rather your focus should be on developing yourself, working through your issues, and maybe getting a girlfriend. Spam approaching tons of women when you have other issues that need to be addressed is not wise or advised. Look if you already got you’re shit together then go for it but otherwise you need to be focused on other things.
When I look at most guys who get into the PUA stuff they have other much more important issues they need to work out before concerning themselves with getting laid. They have health issues, mental issues, and other issues that need to be dealt with first before they can truly make the most out of cold approaching. Look once you have your shit together and are a masculine man then cold approaching and all hat is loads of fun, trust me. But before then focus on what’s important.
Focus on getting your shit together before anything else. Maybe get a girlfriend to deal with your sexual frustration. But work on building a life that you love and investing in yourself. Start with hitting the gym, dressing nice, getting your T levels up, work on your speech and body language, read tons of non-fiction on any weak areas you have (sales books are great for social calibration), and have your number one focus on building an overall healthy lifestyle not cold approaching 100 women so 1 will sleep with you.
Summary
So this started out as an article on the basics of game and morphed into the unhealthiness of PUA for the majority of males. Work on building your income, having a healthy body, building social skills, getting your T levels up, and expanding your mind in addition to sleeping with women. Honestly I would say the majority of guys that get into the PUA stuff hardcore are better off simply getting a girlfriend to take care of their sexual needs and then dedicating their time to improving themselves and ironing out any issues that need to be ironed out.
If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it. You can follow me on Twitter here.
-Charles Sledge
