You’ve seen a hamster wheel before right? You know where the little rodent gets up on and it spins and spins and spins as he furiously works himself to get somewhere. Yet in the end all he did was waste of a bunch of time and expend a bunch of energy with nothing to show for it. That’s sort of how pickup, seduction, or whatever you want to call it works for most males. They work and work and work get rejection after rejection thinking that if they just get a few more rejections (like getting a few more reps) then they’ll get better and stronger. While no doubt there is value in going after things and facing fear there is no value in burning yourself just to burn yourself.
Sort of like it’s productive to push through those last couple of reps of squats when your legs and lungs are burning but there is no point in slamming you head against the wall harder and harder and pushing through the pain. Attracting women should be a small part of a full life however most males (especially PUA types) make it the focus of their life and have little to show for it. I can approach one thousand girls and ten of them will give me their number is success to them, not a pathetic waste of time.
PUA
First off not everything related to PUA and seduction is bad. There is much good in it and tons to learn from it. However the problem comes with most PUAs and their type is that they try to attract women through scripts, routines, and such instead of doing so through nature. Attraction is a natural and primal act. It would be like trying to fill a bucket when you’ve poked several holes in the bottom of it. Foolish and a waste of time. They try to boil seduction down to a series of numbers and models instead of a natural primal act (which is what it is). They try to quarantine it in their little methods and then wonder why they have to approach one hundred girls to get one to sleep with them.
This isn’t to say that there isn’t value in anything PUA has to say. There is much value but it cannot replace what PUAs try to replace. These PUA guys are fighting an uphill battle that can never be won. They are trying to replace masculinity and testosterone with scripts, methods, and psychology and fail miserably against guys who embrace their sexuality naturally as a man. PUA is unnaturally trying to accomplish a natural act. Does that make sense? It would be like instead of simply eating the food on your plate because you’re hungry having some complicated contraption that takes one hundred moving parts and months to build that flings food at your face occasionally landing in your mouth. Then declaring that random time to food goes into your mouth success.
Testosterone
Women are attracted to a man’s sexuality. Meaning his masculinity and his testosterone. If every PUA out there was forced to take a bottle of test they would find that they’re success would shoot up ten fold (at least) at that there was no need for all this complicated nonsense. They’d probably still do it for all the money but they’d realize that it’s largely nonsense. Getting your testosterone levels up will do more for your success with women then approaching one hundred women ever will. Harsh but true. As well as testosterone (and masculinity) has a host of other benefits beyond sleeping with the women that you want. Benefits that affect all areas of your life.
Trying to pick up women without testosterone and masculinity would be like trying to fire a bullet with no gunpowder. You could have the best designed bullet but it’s not going to matter if it doesn’t have what makes it go in the first place. Another way to put it is like running with a two hundred pound weight strapped to your chest versus running with no weight. Why fight against yourself? PUAs teach you to just run harder with that two hundred pound weight instead of getting rid of the weight in the first place which will make you run fast than you ever have or could before.
Masculinity First
Your masculinity should be the focus of your life. Pursuing your mission. Not chasing women (which doesn’t work well when you’re not masculine anyways). PUA is for the most part a cheap band aid over a gushing wound. It’s not going to do much good. Most PUAs (and especially their followers) issues is that they have low levels of testosterone and low levels of masculinity. If they fixed those then not only would they have more women then they know what to do with but they’d also live fulfilling lives doing what they want and going after what they want. Instead PUA becomes a vicious cycle where they keep going around and around never solving the issue.
Like the person who takes medication after medication yet keeps eating the same poison. If you never get to the root of the problem you’ll spend all your time and energy hacking at the branches, which will get you nowhere. This isn’t to say that there isn’t value in knowledge about women and seduction because there certainly is. What I’m getting at is that there are things far more important for both your overall life and well being as well as your success with women. Things like your masculinity and testosterone. Focus on and take care of these things first and the other things will take care of themselves.
Summary
Your success with women (and life) is directly proportional to your levels of masculinity and testosterone. Not what scripts or tactics you’ve memorized. Sleeping with women is a natural and primal act not a cerebral one. There are guys who sleep with hundreds of women without being famous simply because they’re masculine and have high testosterone levels. Then there are guys who know everything there is to know about women (and would absolutely kill it if they got their masculinity and testosterone right) yet sleep with few because of their testosterone and masculinity.
The guy who sleeps with few might even spend ten, twenty, or one hundred times the amount of effort as the guy who sleeps with women left and right. It’s not effort that matters. It’s masculinity and testosterone levels. Sure effort can help. For example when guys have equal levels of masculinity and testosterone then effort will matter but not if they have different levels. If you have an army of guys in loin clothes with clubs and your opponent has an army of guys with steel armor and rifles then no matter how much effort you put in you’ll lose. Now if you both have the steel armor and rifles that’s a different story. But until then focus on getting the steel armor and rifles not the effort.
If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it. You can follow me on Twitter here.
-Charles Sledge
